Halloween Special – From the low-carb cauldron! Musings on a witch’s waistline…

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    Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
    Fillet of a fenny snake,
    In the caldron boil and bake;
    Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
    Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
    Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting,
    Lizard’s leg, and owlet’s wing,—
    For a charm of powerful trouble,
    Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

Shakespeare’s famous witches scene from Macbeth reinforces what many of us have always known… Witches were very low-carb eaters…

Irrefutable evidence from a number of late-medieval manuscripts, corroborates what fictional sources such as Macbeth have always confirmed. Shakespeare actually lifted the above recipe straight from the period’s most popular ketogenic cookbook: ‘The Low-Carb Cauldron’.

Ingredients such as newts’ eyes and fenny snake were highly prized for their omega 3 and rich saturate density. Bat-wool provided an excellent source of non-soluble dietary-fibre, which slowed down digestion in the gut, thereby promoting feelings of satiety and quelling hunger-pangs.

In fact, depictions of the classic witch’s wand are actually a primitive form of keto-stick. Their frequent testing of urine-samples served only to heighten the existing suspicion and contempt, held against them by an increasingly obese society of glucose-intolerants.

In the end, it was that society’s jealousy over how witches stayed so ‘magically slim’ that led to their vilification and gave rise to the notorious witch-hunts which so plagued the middle-ages.

So ‘witch’ diet will you follow today…? My money’s on LCHF!

Thanks for reading and Happy Halloween!

Adam.

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